Oh boy, talk about guilt.
It was such a rushed morning; Samuel didn't get out of bed until 7:40 and we have to be out the door at 7:50. Granted, I was up and ready, and I could have gotten him up. But he ... ah, now this sounds so silly, but he looked like he needed more sleep. Anyway, I dressed him, shoved an Eggo waffle into his hand and took him to the bus stop. Poor kid. His teacher called my husband after kindergarten was over and asked if Sam had had meds. Nnnnnnnnnope.
She said she was amazed once more at the contrast. "Everything is exaggerated when he's not medicated," she said. "I tell him to get his crayons from his cubby, and I look over, and the crayons are on the floor, and then he's on the floor."
When my husband told me that, all I could do was laugh. Welcome to the last 5 years of my life -- everything exaggerated. That's one of the truest descriptions I've heard of life with an unmedicated person with ADHD. Everything they do is out of bounds, out of control.
At his afterschool program, Sam sassed the teacher all afternoon, we heard. At home, he broke my umbrella. I remembered when he used to break something almost every day -- clocks, doors, shelves ... it's a wonder we have anything left, really.
I know he didn't feel good about that day. I feel bad that he had it because I didn't do my job properly in the morning. I think it affects how he feels about himself when he can't get his behavior under control.
Here's to a better day today.