We have met birthmom T and sister S before, but in an abbreviated way (at placement on June 1, 2001) and in a hurried way (when she visited Utah in October 2004 and we made a quick trip there to see her). This time we had almost four days to be together - really together, because she stayed with us in our tiny house - and get to know each other. And we love each other more than ever. We are alike in so many ways and most of all we see more and more similarities between A and his birthfamily. It is fun. It's not always easy, especially when it comes time to say goodbye. But it is so good for all of us. T remains sure of her adoption decision.We love getting to know her.
A couple of people - friends who, like us, are involved with the foster care system - have asked us if it feels safe to us. Absolutely it does. But I don't know if I'd choose to have the birthparents of any of my other kids stay with us. I wish they were as wonderful and stable and trustworthy and loving as T, so I could. Complicated life, darn it.
4 comments:
So neat. We feel the same way, it's so complicated isn't it? We are going to stop and see Maddy's birthgrandma, and mom on our way to Utah. We are staying with her grandma, we just adore them. We wrote the boys birth families and told them we were moving (about two months ago) and never heard back. Sigh.
What a wonderful post and what a wonderful family you are building!
What an event! To make such a special time even more meaningful is worth the snug fit in a small house and the hard goodbyes. You have such a loving perspective, Ana. It makes A that much more fortunate to have you as his mother.
how totally cool is that. and you know, Abe has the same nose as his birth sister! its so neat to see them together. what a blessing!
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